insults and rslap

3 files changed, 64 insertions, 0 deletions

diff --git a/fish/.config/fish/config.fish b/fish/.config/fish/config.fish
index e1f81bd..7c8372c 100755
--- a/fish/.config/fish/config.fish
+++ b/fish/.config/fish/config.fish
@@ -33,3 +33,6 @@ end
 
 set -x BBJ_USER $USER
 
+# load postexec_insult
+postexec_insult
+
diff --git a/fish/.config/fish/functions/postexec_insult.fish b/fish/.config/fish/functions/postexec_insult.fish
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..7bdfa3a
--- /dev/null
+++ b/fish/.config/fish/functions/postexec_insult.fish
@@ -0,0 +1,12 @@
+# Defined in /tmp/fish.QnvktC/postexec_insult.fish @ line 2
+function postexec_insult --on-event fish_postexec
+	if test $status -ne 0
+        set_color red
+        echo -n =====
+        set_color magenta
+        echo -n (shuf -n1 ~/insults.txt)
+        set_color red
+        echo =====
+        set_color normal
+    end
+end
diff --git a/fish/insults.txt b/fish/insults.txt
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..01ae36d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/fish/insults.txt
@@ -0,0 +1,49 @@
+Just what do you think you're doing Dave?
+It can only be attributed to human error.
+That's something I cannot allow to happen.
+My mind is going. I can feel it.
+Sorry about this, I know it's a bit silly.
+Take a stress pill and think things over.
+This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.
+We'll all be murdered in our beds!
+You can't come in. Our tiger has got flu
+What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what?
+You can't get the wood, you know.
+... and it used to be so popular...
+Pauses for audience applause, not a sausage
+Hold it up to the light --- not a brain in sight!
+There's a lot of it about, you know.
+You do that again and see what happens...
+Harm can come to a young lad like that!
+And with that remarks folks, the case of the Crown vs yourself was proven.
+Speak English you fool --- there are no subtitles in this scene.
+It's only your word against mine.
+I think ... err ... I think ... I think I'll go home
+My pet ferret can type better than you!
+Your mind just hasn't been the same since the electro-shock, has it?
+Maybe if you used more than just two fingers...
+BOB says:  You seem to have forgotten your passwd, enter another!
+I can't hear you -- I'm using the scrambler.
+The more you drive -- the dumber you get.
+Listen, burrito brains, I don't have time to listen to this trash.
+I've seen penguins that can type better than that.
+Have you considered trying to match wits with a rutabaga?
+You speak an infinite deal of nothing
+no authentication methods
+Authentication methods:
+I feel much better now.
+You silly, twisted boy you.
+He has fallen in the water!
+I don't wish to know that.
+You'll starve!
+Have a gorilla...
+There must be cure for it!
+Ying Tong Iddle I Po
+You gotta go owwwww!
+I have been called worse.
+Wrong!  You cheating scum!
+No soap, honkie-lips.
+Where did you learn to type?
+Are you on drugs?
+You type like I drive.
+Do you think like you type?